A Little Bit About A Lot of Things


I’m one of those weird people that knows a little bit, about a lot of things. Because my favorite hobby is learning. Sometimes, this is annoying for other people. I don’t really think about it much and never in depth. Now, it might be a good thing…

Around the 4th of July, I started having “stomach” issues. Mostly, I felt bloated all the time. I take opiates and considered the problem could be constipation. But I seemed to be using the bathroom regularly. Ok, maybe it’s a stomach bug. July 13th, we went to Olathe, Kansas for Jude’s birthday. It was a barbecue. I grabbed a cheese burger. And I got such a stomach ache and heartburn afterwards, I thought it likely I’d die on the way home.

As July continued, I found myself skipping lunch several times. Not entirely, but I’d cook food and then feel full or sick after a few bites. I decided I probably had a stomach bug. I cleaned out my system with the help of small pills and was still having the problem, we can rule out constipation. Back to stomach bug theory, but it’s lasted too long. What on Earth?

So, then I noticed I was getting heartburn late at night. Come 8 pm, I drink milk for the rest of my time awake. I LOVE milk. I only drink white milk, because chocolate milk is sickeningly sweet. And I’ll drink a gallon of milk by myself in two or three days. But, I kept getting heartburn… Now, milk has always helped my heartburn and I have no idea what’s causing my late night heartburn, I don’t have a gallbladder and while I have a small amount of acid reflux, it is rarely a problem. I’ve been waking up early every morning because of a stomach ache and eating doesn’t make it go away.

July 30th, I picked my first ripe jalapeno off the plant. For the record, it was the hottest jalapeno I’ve ever eaten. And it caused me a quick stabbing pain in my upper abdomen. Well, okay, that’s weird. I had sliced it and put it on pizza. I continued to eat the pizza, but picked all the jalapeno off. Friday night, I stuffed 2 jalapenos. I ate one and every time I took a bite of it, my stomach had that same quick stabbing pain.

Now, I’ve been eating small amounts all month and then giving up on food, because it made me feel bloated. Then it hit me on Friday night…. I bet I have an ulcer. I’ve never had an ulcer. I don’t know why I know the symptoms of having an ulcer, but I know dairy can make the symptoms worse as can spicy food. I know why I know that ulcers are caused by bacteria. I read the debate in the 1990s about whether the Australian scientist who discovered it was caused by a bacteria should get a Nobel Prize in Medicine or not, since he experimented on himself.

I also know the two go to antibiotics to treat H. Py?!? are amoxicillin and tetracycline. I have no clue why I know this… I can’t remember whether I paid a bill, but I can remember this stuff for some reason. The problem is that both tend to make me vomit, even if I take them with food. But I also can’t live without my milk. Thankfully, my primary care doctor is a nice guy. I’ve had doctors do everything in their power to prove me wrong, when I’ve gone in and said something like “Hey, I think I have a sinus infection.” And it usually leads to a misdiagnosis and multiple trips to doctors. My primary always says “Well, you’re a smart girl and you know your body, if you think you have X we’ll check it out.”

So, I’m not worried about the appointment, I have no doubt, I can walk into the room and say to my doctor “I think I have an ulcer” and we’ll discuss my symptoms and he’ll go “Yeah, I think you do too. We’ll set up a test to be sure, but we’ll go ahead and prescribe antacids and antibiotics in the meantime.”

Now, because I’m pretty sure the antibiotics are going to make me sick, I suspect I’ll be taking a few more days off in August. I don’t know the treatment regimen beyond taking antibiotics and antacids. However, Oh My Wizard is already with Krissy. So, even if I don’t get a lot of writing done, I will get it published, since it’s complete and just needs editing. At the moment, all my publications for the rest of the year are on track.

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